A GIANT WORM

A giant worm the size of a worm that is bigger than other worms pressed itself against a building and made it all slimy. The building was grossed out and ran away to wash the worm juice off it in the bathroom. As the building looked at itself in the mirror, it got to thinking about how it'd spent all of it's life so far just standing there in the city, providing a place of shelter for humans to conduct their financial transactions. In a way it could feel good about this life of quiet service, but right now the building felt indignant about never having looked out for it's own needs. It shook all the people out of itself and heading to the railroad tracks. It would hop a boxcar and start getting into all the adventures it had missed out. At least three per day. First it would need a handkerchief to tie around it's neck. And a good knife.

MY SKIN FEELS SO GOOD

My skin feels so good that I feel i should invite the world's refugees to come and live on my skin. Come tired wanderers, rest your heads on this soft pillowy bed of mildly hair skin and in the morning we can get to work building a new city for you here, first some makeshift shelter and then onto barns and farming type things and eventually windmills and office buildings and giant statues of fallen loved ones and space needle lookouts and I wonder how I will get around doing my daily business with all these things hanging off me. I shall certainly have to have my tailor make a few adjustments to my sports coats, perhaps the people can just live on one arm, and I can pioneer a new look in one armed sports coats.

THERE IS A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG LADY ASLEEP IN MY BED

There is a beautiful young lady asleep in my bed.  I am awake. Oftentimes I am asleep in my bed and she is here, awake. There are brief periods and odd times when we are both here awake at the same time and we eat sandwiches full of cheese and look into each others eyes. But this is not one of those times. She is breathing softly into the purple pillow and her bleached white hair and her brown skin and the purple pillow make for a fine combination. There are no ants running through her hair.

CRUMBLING THE MOIST FLAKES

Crumbling the moist flakes of this acrid unknown material into the joint, I wondered if i was making a poor life choice. Had Albert Einstein begun his journey into legendary science guy status in such a manner? I concluded that he probably had, twisted it up and puffed away. As the noxious purple smoke entered my lungs and circulated throughout my bloodstream and fizzed in my brain, I started to formulate all kinds of scientific theories. They seemed to be presenting themselves to me fully formed, but I had no academic basis in science whatsoever so i couldn't understand them at all. I asked the man next to me if he could take a picture of my brain for later assessment.

FEEBLE MINDED SYCOPHANTS IN JODHPURS

Feeble minded sycophants in jodhpurs all rushing up a hill, tearing at one another till they are nothing but skeletons in jodhpurs, eventually each bone is severed from the other and the entire hill is covered white with bones. The beige jodhpurs slide to the bottom and make a ring around the hill, a moat of jodhpurs if you will. It looks like some kind of upside down chicken and rice dish, but all those bones are soon set upon by dogs and each one runs away wagging it's tail with an "I've got a new bone, and I stole it!" gleam in it's eye.

THE BITTER TASTE HUNG AROUND MY MOUTH FOR SEVERAL DAYS

The bitter taste hung around my mouth for several days, unabated. I tried eating c antelope and drinking gin with milk and i gargled drain cleaning fluid and i scraped my tongue with a razor but it was to no avail. I realized the bitterness must be in my brain so I went onto the rooftop and meditated for three days, through the rain and hail and lighting. I was struck by lightning seven times. It seemed ridiculous. When i returned to the ground, I could not walk in a straight line so i took to walking sideways, like a crab. I used my hands like pincers, and when i wanted someone to pass me the salt, I would look them hard in the eye and make the "click click" pincer movement with my hands.

UNDERNEATH THE NIGHT SKY

Underneath the night sky there walk little feet with three prongs of spiky nailed yellow tough skin that scratches the ground in morse code, Alerting the other fowl that the time for action is now. The chickens and pheasants and geese and water ducks gather in the clearing and form a great bird pyramid. Eventually the very highest bird is able to reach the moon. It gives it one fierce peck and the moon cracks open, with a mighty crack that sends a wave shooting through the universe, spinning planets around and shooting cosmic dust all over the place. The great fiery bird emerges from the moon and squawks haughtily.