MY FUNKY BOOM BOX

My funky boom box sprouted arms and legs and starting making for my best tapes to eat 'em up. I hadn't played a tape on that sucker in like 7 years, cause I know that shit eats tapes, and obviously the box had got hungry and resentful and pent up angry and decided to take matters in it's own hands. But fuck that. I dived in front of the tape stash and stared the box right in it's tuning dial. "You not getting any closer, box", I said real cold, "or you gonna get your antenna snatched off." The box lunged and it's strength was terrifying. We were rolling around on the floor, tapes skidding all over, it's tape compartment flapping open and closed, smacking me in the face, it's power cable whipping me like a devils tail.