I HAD JUST ONE BIG TOOTH

I had just one big tooth and one big finger, and I would smear the paste across my big wide tooth with my big fat finger. It didn't seem all that effective, and I worried that if I got a cavity and this tooth had to come out, that was it. It was pea soup for me from then on. I like pea soup, don't get me wrong, but I have a full life ahead of my that I hope to be full of biting into apples and buttocks and gold dubloons.